Free Printable Unwinnable Feminist Super Bowl Bingo Sheet

The idea for this post started off as a tiny nugget: “What if Doritos showed an ad for Cool Ranch instead of Nacho Cheesier?”

Then I thought, “Wouldn’t be nice to see an ad featuring a same-sex couple? Or a plus-sized person that wasn’t the butt of a joke? Or men doing dishes? And why on earth is menstrual blood always portrayed as blue in ads for pads?”

Behold, friends: Unwinnable Super Bowl Bingo. The totally free, printable PDF, complete with translation chart, is right here. Play along at home.

What else are you going to do — actually care about sports?

Unwinnable-Super-Bowl-Bingo

You will not win, friends. No one ever will. But each square is one step closer to a more diverse, interesting world.

Crossing the Cthulu square off might be the last thing you ever do.

BING— death.

6 New 2014-2015 Shows To Kill Winter Boredom

When the going gets tough, the weak watch TV.

Stave off the worst of the winter duldrums with these new shows. The best thing about brand-spanking-new first-year TV is that you can’t possibly be behind. You might even be… ahead.

Today’s topics:

  • sword-making
  • semi-closeted homosexuals
  • pretentious trailers
  • the Daily Show‘s edgier friend
  • a shit-ton of live-action comic book characters

Behold…

My Cheering Squad: The Week In Media

I don’t know what would happen if Eeyore were to detox from meth, but please try to imagine that vibe.

Hold it in your head.

Okay.

That was me. Minus being a stuffed animal, on meth.

A foul, icky mood penetrated my pores today. It squiggled into my heart and rode the hemoglobin express to every capillary of my being.

I was angry about things that happened before. I dreaded things that were going to happen.

Then I thought:

I could keep this up, or I could put a lid on it. A figurative giant glass lid. Maybe even a bell jar.

I’m going to stopper everything that’s not today, because today is going fine.

I made today’s word “present.”

Not-Today-Satan

What’s going on right now that I really dig? My Cheering Squad week in media, of course! Today: Big Hero 6, Gotham, and new books by Amy Poehler and Jim Gaffigan!

What kind of name is Fish Mooney?

PENGUIN3

The characters in Gotham seem unaware that they live in an overblown Telemundo-style alternate dimension.

When you start to think that Gotham‘s acting is terrible, you need only remind yourself that the show is not meant to depict reality. It is the essence of stylization. It’s an homage to the genre. Gotham is basically Batman: The Animated Series, in live-action form.

A producer seems to have sat down and said, “Take the craziest shit from the comics, then turn it up to 11.”

Jada Pinkett-Smith replied, “Done. I call Fish Mooney.”

Then someone said, “There is no ‘Fish Mooney’ in the comics.”

To which Jada Pinkett-Smith flipped a table. They just let her have it.