Tag: real life

5 Dreadful Decorating Choices In This Cabin

My New Years experience was lovely: friends, board games, alcohol, taking turns making delicious home-cooked meals.

The only (slight) party-dampener was how fugly our cabin was. To say nothing of the musty smell or the plethora of itchy bug-bites I now possess.

Let’s investigate the worst design choices.

1. Sticks on the wall

“The cabin is in the outdoors, so I guess ‘outdoors’ will be my motif. I’m not one of those sheeple who spends money at big box stores. I’m going to ‘shop my backyard.'”

It’s possible for this to work!

… Or one can opt to simply hammer branches and twigs to the walls. In every room of one’s home.

2. A sad magnet situation

There were two magnets: one that said to clean up, and one that was an image of a television.

The television is unfathomable to me. If there are only two magnets, and the TV is one of them, it must mean something right? But what?

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It’s Wacky Wednesday Waffle Day! Links to distract & amaze you.

These past few days have taken a toll on us all. We deserve to treat ourselves to a few fun links. Stop strolling through your racist aunt’s Facebook rants and start checking these out instead.

If you think dancing, neon-colored spiders sounds kind of cute, you’re right!

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^ A photographer started recreating the iconic Scary Stories to Tell In The Dark illustrations with beautiful photo collages.

The only thing on my holiday this year is getting an AI-enhanced talking Billy Bass fish like this.

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^ Every designer will nod knowingly at this delightful page of Famous Artworks Ruined By Clients Who Think They Know Better.

I’m very happy to have found Mari Andrew’s Instagram account. The artist turns the little painful moments of her life into the cutest comics/doodles.

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^ Wanna learn about architecture and make fun of hideous McMansions at the same time? McMansion Hell is for you!

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^ You know you want one of these onesies. This photo is the beginning and end of my modeling career. It was good while it lasted. Warm. Soft. I didn’t have to lose a pound.

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^ When not modeling, I throw fancy tea parties. If you want to throw one of your own, here are a few tips!

I hope this helps with your day, everyone. Stay strong!

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4-Year-Olds Talking About Death

A 4-year-old buddy of mine and I were drawing on a blackboard over the weekend.

We were being quiet when she looked into my eyes and said:

“When I die, I want to remember drawing with you.”

Which was very sweet, but very ominous. Kids can be really creepy.

I told her she had a long time before she died. It’s what we both needed to hear, even if it’s not necessarily true.

Trust me: anything can happen. Yesterday was the first book club since one of our founding members abruptly died.

If-I-Die

Matt was a runner, a tea enthusiast, an LGBT activist, and a Scrabble player at the state level.

Matt was in his 30s.

One day, he fell ill and went to the hospital. The doctors found basically nothing but cancer inside him.

He was gone within 2 weeks.

BookClub

A bunch of our members know each other through a cancer support group (which he was not, ironically, in).

A few didn’t come to the meeting, maybe because the emotional wound still hurt.

Matt’s ottoman sat empty while we discussed the meh-ness of the book. I don’t think he’d’ve liked it, either.

I guess we’ll have to consult with him on the other side, if there is one.

Inside my Sketchbook: Terrifying Dali-Masked Male Ballerinas In Tutus

Want to see a performance that’s halfway between Cirque Du Soleil and the most fucked thing you’ve ever seen? Try La Verite!

It has all the Dali-masked ballerinas in tutus you could ever need. There are also people in giant rhino heads, enormous dandelions, trapeze artists, and a goddamn terrifying doll controlled by men in all black.

Lots of great nightmares to sketch.

Masks-On-Masks

Also on the drawing radar: the break room table. Sketching during lunch beats checking your email or Facebook (again).

Ugh, Facebook. I need a cleanse.

Break-Room-Doodles

In response to questions you probably didn’t have:

1. No, I’ve never had sriracha before yesterday. I get on board with everything too late.

2. The only exception to my Whole30 diet is one of Liz’s tiny cupcakes a week. She makes these itsy-bitsy, dainty cupcakes from scratch and brings them in every Friday. They are very special.

3. I absolutely make lists of the dogs I pet in the street. The giant brindled English bulldog was at the post office. The doofy, slightly-greasy pug was on the sidewalk by a tiny subterranean Korean restaurant.

4. The pens/inks used were Bent Nib Jinhao w/Japanese Beautyberry, Hero 9315 w/Visconti Bordeaux, a vintage Pelikano w/Pelikan turquoise, and a vintage Sheaffer w/Private Reserve Ebony Purple. I use a lot of vintage fountain pens because I keep snapping them up at thrifts, antiques shops, flea markets, etc. I clean them out and re-fill them with blunt-nib syringes. Here are a few on Instagram.

5. I really do have a friend named Jiggy. (She insists her Korean birth name is unpronounceable.) She sits next to me and eats the healthiest stuff imaginable so she can continue being (literally) the strongest woman I know.

Jiggy

I draw her lunches in the vain hope that some of that healthiness will rub off on me.

My fountain pens are basically tiny barbells, right?

… Right?

I almost drove off the road because I realized the government was watching me.

I noticed a tiny microphone on my car dash this morning. I’d never seen it before.

WHATISTHIS

What in the sweet fuck was this? 

I’m not going to lie, Internet: I was pretty sure it was a bug that Big Brother inserted to spy on me.

I tried to yank it out for a minute, then, when I couldn’t, vowed to snip it later in the day.

Or maybe to Google it.

Turns out that the mike is, most likely, a Bluetooth mike that ties in with the new sound system I installed a month or two ago.

The government is not listening to me singing along to the Spice Girls.

What a relief.

Mostly for them.