Immersion therapy might not work.

I spent a lot of time working on these drawings, and I’m still terrified of vintage dolls.

Dolls-Are-Creepy

They’re just biding their time until they murder me in my sleep.

Speaking of creepy dolls…

King-Cake-Baby

Yeah. It’s a mascot (creepy) and a doll (creepy) in one, creating a creep-glomerate that is more terrifying than the sum of its parts.

It was brought to my attention by Chris Hardwick on At Midnight (which can be watched On Demand, if staying up late isn’t your bag, and you have that service). To thank him, I drew this.

King Cake Baby Illustration

You’re welcome, His Therapist.

Drawings of Statues

I drew a couple of graveyard statues I found on Pinterest the other day.

Statues

Foo Dogs (below) aren’t common in cemeteries, but we have one protecting the grave of my childhood Shetland Sheepdog, Buddy.

Three-Fu

Before I leave my parents’ house, I always pop up to the white foo dog statue and say goodbye.

I love cemeteries.

I’ll keep you abreast of other cool statues or painstaking pencil renderings as they happen.

My Inappropriate Alien Valentine

I wrote a post last year about how atheism helped me deal with my fear issues.

It feels good to be a functional adult who doesn’t live in terror of darkness all the time, but it’s also kind of… a letdown.

The world’s a little less magical. There are no demons, but there also no saints — or unicorns, or witches, or healing crystals.

Want-To-Believe

There are also probably no aliens who want to touch our butts.

There’s nothing that would complete Valentine’s Day like aliens all up on the bootay.

Dinosaurs didn’t like aberrant weather, either.

I don’t understand the Polar Vortex. Does it or does it not have something to do with global warming?

When people get all up-in-arms about meteorology (“climate change: is it real?”), I’m like, “Hey, I’m not having kids that’ll have to live through that, so… best of luck. Hopefully I’ll kick it before that really manifests. You guys should really do something about that, I guess.”

Speaking of worldwide weather catastrophe

Skull-Velo

Jurassic Park is wrong. Real velociraptors would actually only go up to your elbow, and they’re actually covered in feathers.

Skull-TRex

Fact: T-Rex hates pushups.

Skull-Trike

Related: Can we take a second and talk about the thing I almost bought my husband for V-Day?

Stupid-Fabulous

Do I get anything resembling “grown-up points” for passing this up? I decided it was only 2 feet tall; and if I was going to get a lawn dinosaur, I’d need to go bigger.

More Gym Favorites

My workouts may be dull, but the people at the YMCA are the salt of the earth. It’s one of the best places for people-watching ever.

GYM

This week’s YMCA’s Greatest Hits are: 

  • The woman who still owns a Discman
  • The woman in the sari, dangle earrings, and glasses-with-chain who was killing it on the treadmill
  • The weight-lifting old man in the argyle sweater

I’m sure if they were describing me, they’d call me “that girl who sometimes sings out loud with her headphones because she forgets she’s in public.”