This Week’s Links: Heavy-Hitters & Longer Reads

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(image via arthlete)

Body positivity & exercise:

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(image by Amber Zuniga)

Being careful what you do on the Internet — especially if you’re a woman:

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(image by Lisa Sterle)

Fabulous: In the trash, on the stage, in Gotham, and at brunch. (Links.)

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^ If you liked Macklemore’s “Thrift Shop,” you’ll love his appearance on Sesame Street where he raps about the glory of rooting through the trash. Sometimes thrifting does feel like digging through rubbish.

★ You should meet Skellie, the skeleton who imitates every female on Instagram, ever. She is so “literally dead” right now.

Katy Perry’s sharks were the best part of the super bowl.

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^ Perfect Person George Takei answers stupid questions about gay people. My question is: why would anyone not like brunch? I imagine even the Nazis approve of brunch.

★ The video I Kind Of Hate Batman points out that, though Batman saves Gotham, he does nothing to improve it. Bruce Wayne should be devoting his billions to addressing the infrastructure, schools, poverty, and homelessness problems of his city — instead of battling crime by himself.

Oh no. Now I kind of hate Batman, too. But only a little.

I still mostly love Batman.

Here’s why most movies look sort of blue & orange. Sorry; now you’ll never be able to un-see it.

★ Watch people argue over whether this is basic math. Spoiler: it is.

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^ Why people hate on Tess Munster (and all happy fat people) nails it. Fat people are only “okay” when they hate themselves, and here’s a potential reason why.

★ We didn’t always hate on fat people. Here’s 3,000 years of ideal body types. I would have been popular in ancient Greece.

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^ There was only one body type on display at the Miss Universe pageant, but there were a variety of ugly costumes to make fun of. Like Canada here. With a scoreboard hot-glued to her person and a Stanley Cup fascinator.

★ Loving on the casting of the all-female Ghostbusters reboot.

★ And, finally: are your blizzard supplies prepared?

2015’s first link attack!

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^ Nobody tells it as straight as Grumpy Cat.

Speaking of cats, a little old lady was arrested for making fur coats out of them. That takes the cliche of the “crazy cat lady” to another place altogether.

This time-lapse video of a paper maché dragon being made just got me pregnant.

Italian Circus Paints Puppies and Calls Them Pandas. I want one.

Junior Scientist Power Hour’s Christmas comic was especially surreal, even for Abby.

Ready yourself for sobs: “Today I Learned Something About My Boyfriend that No Girl Should Ever Have to Discover.” Okay — maybe they’re sobs of laughter.

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^ Each of America’s 50 states perfectly summarized in one sentence.

This list of 8 crazy foreign versions of American TV shows is great. I would watch It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia in any language.

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^ Is this image proof positive of a Godless universe?

Honest Trailer covered the most recent TMNT movie! This video hits all the low points so you don’t have to actually watch the film.

I loved Jezebel’s 2014 fashion trend roundup. This article features the phrase “fabrics that time travel.”

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^ Hey lazy, you might be able to do these 2015 resolutions.

Goths at the gym, vampire birds, and crickets for dinner

Wanna hear the “scream of 1,000” corpses? Try this death whistle.

Speaking of creepy science: vampire birds.

15 Foods to Add To Your Diet in 2015 — Spoiler: it’s crickets.

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It’s okay; I wasn’t emotionally ready for the Little Prince trailer, either.

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The diametric opposite of that trailer is this one involving Zombie Christ and, from the same movie (apparently), Hitler riding a T-Rex.

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Health Goth: When Darkness and Gym Rats Meet — Why doesn’t my local YMCA have a Nine Inch Nails cycling class on offer? (Photo via Danai Moshona.)

Come make fun of white people: The 2014 Hater’s Guide to the Williams-Sonoma Catalog.

Starling’s Starred Links: October Edition

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Weight loss is hard! Here’s Gala Darling talking about proudly owning up to all the work you put into yourself.

I’m disappointed the three-boob lady isn’t real.

Yinz need to listen up: Pittsburghers have America’s Ugliest Accent.  I find it hard to believe the Yinzers beat Boston — or the entire South — but okay.

This scare article about Dungeons and Dragons from 1985 is hilarious. “You do not casually play [Dungeons and Dragons], just as you do not casually take heroin.”

Daddy’s a shapeshifter is a creepy story. That’s a Stephen King novella waiting to happen.

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^ This image might be the definition of a First World Problem. That said, I have suffered in this way.

Hilarious and true: a teen was arrested for having sex with a stuffed house in a Wal-Mart. Guess which state it happened in. Just guess. Then click on the article and find out. Oh, while you’re there, giggle at every detail.

Someone threatened to shoot up Penn State last week. He said it was a “prank.”

Speaking of bad news, there are plenty of Ebola-themed crafts on Etsy.

And, finally, Facebook gave me this ad:

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Its algorithm must be very advanced to know how to combine my interests like that. What a blessing the Internet is.