These 5 sketchbook spreads will make you more stupid.

“Do male Medusas go bald?” 

You can’t un-read that dumb-ass question.

Space Banksy says: “I flew millions of light years to leave my art in your craps!” 

What if crop circles are “real”? Are they the equivalent of a teenager with a can of spray paint?

Are crop circles left by cosmic assholes who are actively disappointing their parents?

“It’s a dog-eat-dog world. But I’m a vegan.” 

To extend the animal metaphor, you can’t win the rat race if you’re not in it. But who wants to be a rat, anyway?

Why are all of the metaphors about getting ahead always animal-based? What does that say about the nature of success? That we lose our humanity to achieve it?

I know. That’s something a nihilistic 14-year-old boy would say.

 

 

Ninja Turtle to Squirrel: “… Dad?”
Squirrel: “Oh hell no. I always use condoms.” 

At what point did Splinter have to tell his kids that they were adopted?

Or did they figure it out on their own?

Donatello: “There’s no one in the universe that Pops could’ve banged to make us come out.”
Raphael: (storms out, breaks stuff)
Leonardo: I’ll go after him, I guess.
Michaelangelo: I’m going to eat my feelings. It’s a 3-pizza kinda day.

Ghosting: “I’m not going to text you back.” 

Was ghosting started by Casper-being passive-aggressive to his girlfriend?

Does your skull hurt from just skimming your eyes over that question?

I hope you found your visit to my sketchbook fun, if not intellectually enlightening.

A Few Good Mensch: How The Jews Saved Earth, Again, in Independence Day Resurgence

The original Independence Day was about a lot of things: stinky alien corpses, Will Smith hitting things, the White House exploding, Data from Star Trek getting possessed, unspoken words between lovers, families reaching across distance, and nerdy Jews.

The two main characters were a studly action star and… geeky, scraggly, hairy, fussy, introverted Jeff Goldblum.

Independence Day was mostly considered “Will Smith’s summer movie this year.” People said “Did you see the new Will Smith movie?”, not “Did you see the new Jeff Goldblum movie?”

It’s surprising, therefore, that Independence Day: Resurgence is a Jeff Goldblum movie. While there is a “Will Smith” character (a similar-looking actor who plays his adopted son from the first movie), he’s hardly on screen at all.

The franchise’s sequel-switcheroo changes everything. It even changes the way I think about the original. 

Mensches

To briefly summarize Independence Day Resurgence:

On the 20th anniversary of the attack, the aliens return. They want to kill us again.

The aliens blow up our satellites and most of our defenses. They wreck our landmarks. The odds look bad.

The president gives a rousing speech. Humans rally. There’s a fight. Some live. Some die. The aliens win. The end.

Just kidding.

After watching the movie, my husband was confused about the huge part that David Levinson (Jeff Goldblum)’s father, Julius Levinson, played in the film. This time around, he doesn’t have any brilliant ideas. He just putzes around and uses a lot of Yiddish. He could have been removed from the movie entirely and not affected the plot a whit.

Mr Levinson is the comedic relief,” I said. “This movie is basically a Jewish comedy with aliens.”

And I realized, after I’d said it, that it was true.

In my heart, David Levinson had always been the protagonist/mastermind. Will Smith was a pawn in Levinson’s game of mental chess against the aliens.

This was the movie version of Garry Kasparov (who had a Jewish dad!) vs Deep Blue — humanity versus the Other.

What’s interesting here is that humanity typically treats Jews like the Other. They’ve historically been treated like second-class citizens, yet they’re the ones spearheading the campaign against the aliens in these films. Their oddness — their unconventional approach — is what usually makes them loathed. But it gives them the intellectual edge here.

Jews are the underdog of humanity. Humanity is the underdog of this fight.

The Independence Day series is a David and Goliath battle, maxed out. 

It’s basically Bible storytelling.

With aliens.

Which makes the plot really simple and archetypal.

Depending on your point of view, that makes Independence Day 1 & 2 either classic or stupid.

Most critics agree that the movie didn’t need to be made twice. Independence Day 2 was a re-hash of the first, with a deluge of callbacks and references. Though it doesn’t break any new ground, it did make me re-consider the first movie in a new light.

And also? It was a shit-ton of fun.

Internet PRO TIP: Put Freaky Birthday Things on Your Friends’ Facebook Walls

When Facebook says, “it’s Muffy’s birthday!”, don’t just write “Happy Birthday!” on her wall.

You’re not a boring tool.

Stand out. Distinguish yourself.

Put this on her wall instead:

birthday_monkey_800p

Nothing says “you successfully clawed your way out of your mother’s womb!” like this piece of work by Rafi Ben Aharon.

Seriously, Google Image Search is your friend.

Science fiction fan? Check out the art of WorldUFOToday’s Rick Lem, who has been “dedicating his home as an outpost for his colorfull [sic] aliens.”

Alien-Art-Birthday-Card

I didn’t know about him before today. Did you? Isn’t your life better now?

Five Fandom Friday: Gift Ideas for A Sci-Fi Geek

Christmas is about giving. It’s also about receiving. This post is a list of suggestions for a sci-fi geek — but it includes a fair number of things I wouldn’t turn down. Just sayin’.

Syfy-Gifts

Custom Star Trek dress ($120) – You’d never have to struggle to decide what to wear to a wedding or job interview again.

Planet Chocolates (approx $30, before shipping) – This is a set of 8 planets. Eight. I miss Pluto.

Doctor Who Watch ($180) – I haven’t seen a lot of Who, but this watch is bangin’.

Galaxy Bedspread ($148) – The opening credits for Space Cases strongly feature the Horsehead Nebula. It’s essentially my nebula.

Alien Abduction Lamp ($90) – Move aside, Christmas Story leg lamp — this is the tackiest in town.

Wicket Ewok Plush ($24) – My name is Leah and I was born in the 80s. Of COURSE someone cleverly gave me an Ewok plush. The new plush is more accurate to the movies, but the 80s version was cuter:

mine

Ray gun pen ($130) – I love it. And the stand. There’s really no justification for a pen that’s more than $20, but LOOK AT IT.

In Search of Aliens

It’s Friday night!

Georgio-Show

I typically kick off my weekends with H2’s combo of Ancient Aliens and Giorgio’s new show, In Search of Aliens.

In Search of Aliens is a crazy show.

I watched an episode that postulated Nessie is a dinosaur that travels through a quartz-fueled time warp in Loch Ness. The reason people can’t find it is because, at the time they’re searching, Nessie is in another time.

Sounds legit.

A part of me wishes this weird shit was true. Magic. Time travel. Dinosaurs still existing. Aliens.

Alas, it’s probably not. In the meantime, we can dream — and watch TV, of course.