Put me on the planning committee of YOUR next event.

Bridal showers and baby showers would be far more interesting if we could fly overhead and literally shower the gifts from the sky.

But things like “etiquette” and “the fact that maybe somebody would die” get in the way. As they always do whenever I want to do something cool.


To the left: a graphic from a Hannibal-themed bridal tea.1

(1 Disclaimer: the bride is a fannibal, but I imposed this theme. No human carcasses will be served, to my knowledge.)

To the right: a literature-themed2 baby shower. Purple is the best color so of course my friend’s kid is going to rock it.

(2 I also imposed this theme. When you’re throwing/designing these events, you get to plan them however the hell you want.) 

Below: A save the date for my company’s holiday party. There’s going to be white wine, ham, rap music, and a photo strip booth. So you know I’ll be there.


Are those adorable elves bouncing on that tolerant reindeer’s back?

Yes. The holidays are upon us.

Whee (I guess)!