5 Acrylic-Infused Sketchbook Spreads! Plus a digression about Laika the Space Dog that’s actually sort of depressing. Sorry about that.

It’s a beautiful Friday! Let’s celebrate with some sketchbook pages.

I can’t draw snails. I don’t even think I have a good idea in my head of how they’re supposed to work. They’re one of the Universe’s weirder offerings. Who came up with  that crap?

Looking at you, Darwin. What niche could that possibly be filling? The “crazy slimy bullshit with an impossible-to-draw shell” demographic?

I draw; then I paint; then I draw some more, just in case. My favorite part of this spread is the upper right corner. I love the dog astronaut.

Speaking of dog astronauts: do you want to be depressed? If yes, read the Wikipedia article Laika the Russian Space Dog. It contains heretofore-unknown horrors. I had not known those horrible facts about that poor animal, its conditions, or its death.

If you’re okay with the way your day was, actually, skip ahead to the next spread and its pithy title.

 

I call this spread “Furries: After Dark.”

Read More 5 Acrylic-Infused Sketchbook Spreads! Plus a digression about Laika the Space Dog that’s actually sort of depressing. Sorry about that.

These 5 sketchbook spreads will make you more stupid.

“Do male Medusas go bald?” 

You can’t un-read that dumb-ass question.

Space Banksy says: “I flew millions of light years to leave my art in your craps!” 

What if crop circles are “real”? Are they the equivalent of a teenager with a can of spray paint?

Are crop circles left by cosmic assholes who are actively disappointing their parents?

“It’s a dog-eat-dog world. But I’m a vegan.” 

To extend the animal metaphor, you can’t win the rat race if you’re not in it. But who wants to be a rat, anyway?

Why are all of the metaphors about getting ahead always animal-based? What does that say about the nature of success? That we lose our humanity to achieve it?

I know. That’s something a nihilistic 14-year-old boy would say.

 

 

Ninja Turtle to Squirrel: “… Dad?”
Squirrel: “Oh hell no. I always use condoms.” 

At what point did Splinter have to tell his kids that they were adopted?

Or did they figure it out on their own?

Donatello: “There’s no one in the universe that Pops could’ve banged to make us come out.”
Raphael: (storms out, breaks stuff)
Leonardo: I’ll go after him, I guess.
Michaelangelo: I’m going to eat my feelings. It’s a 3-pizza kinda day.

Ghosting: “I’m not going to text you back.” 

Was ghosting started by Casper-being passive-aggressive to his girlfriend?

Does your skull hurt from just skimming your eyes over that question?

I hope you found your visit to my sketchbook fun, if not intellectually enlightening.

5 Links, Including A Fugly Shark & Badly-Dressed Teenagers

^ 1. It’d be super-fun to submit something to this year’s Graceful Envelope Contest. Check out the galleries of winners here.

2. We always suspected this, but it’s now been proven that dogs know who’s a jerk.

^ 3. Go ahead and google “goblin shark.” I’ll wait.

4. This Amazon Review makes me laugh every time I think about it. I keep it in my brain’s (metaphorical) back pocket and break it out as needed.

^ 5. The Japanese magazine FRUiTS is shutting down because “there were no more fashionable kids to photograph.” Kids these days. Am I right? Get off my lawn, you shabbily-dressed ragamuffins.

5 Collage-Infused Sketchbook Spreads, Psychologically Examined

Sometimes I look at blank pieces of paper and hiss “stop stressing me out.”

I take them and slap some ripped-up magazines or whatever on top so that insidious whiteness can’t assault me any more. Then I usually glue or draw figures on top, because every page winds up needing some kind of character living on it. Abstraction never feels right on its own.

There are people out there who specialize in looking at what artists choose to draw and draw inferences (pun intended) accordingly.

“If you sketch weird or ugly faces, you are probably mistrustful.”

Uh-oh.

“One who is sensitive to living creatures, the type of animal is a great deal about the mood of the doodler and often the type that the person wants to be (ex: tiger means desire to be courageous, snake means sneaky).” What does a snake crawling out of a totem pole man-bird mean?

“Drawing Several Flowers in Order: desire to see sense of family/togetherness.” (source) What does that mean? And what happens if the flowers are the tail of some kind of ragweed-nightmare mermaid?

Drawing food allegedly indicates “need for love, desire to be filled up, of course it might indicate hunger/thirst.” (source) Hunger/thirst? Yep. I’m always starving.

My choice to draw a hermit crab means “slowness, lack of self-confidence, more introverted tendencies.” (source). True enough!

“Creating spontaneous cartoons aids in information processing. Doodlers who are able to portray emotion in simple drawings are great at discerning customer experience and behavior.” (source) False.

Hit and miss, but pretty interesting anyway!

May you all find deep psychological truths in your illustrations, Internet.

5 great links to enjoy this week.

^ 18 Less-Than-Inspiring Wallpapers. They’re are about to be incorporated into all of my computers.

Why would anyone sell a book for a penny on Amazon? I’ve always wondered about this. Mystery solved.

^ Were you aware? In the 70s, Bhutan had postage stamps that were made of playable vinyl. Learn more here.

^ I yearn for one of these scarves. All the whimsy of an animal-scarf; none of the horror of a literal corpse around your neck. (I keep seeing real vintage mink stoles at antiques stores. The eyes, guys. The eyes.)

^ Can you beat my stats (above) at the 1-minute typing test?

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